My last belly shot

Being that tomorrow, it's been one week since my sudden C-section, I realized that my birthday belly shot of me PG with Kyla was my last belly shot. In our rush to get to the hospital to get the baby out, we completely blanked on taking one last picture of my baby belly. This makes me very sad. I'm so very sad that it was so damn difficult to even GET PG, and now I'm sad that I wasn't able to savor every last minute of my PG with Kyla. Yes, I was miserable with her inside me the last few days, but I was still thankful and blessed to be able to feel her inside me. I just keep walking around tonight, saying "I can't believe it's been a week tomorrow, I can't believe it". Wow.

I'm almost angry (*or is it jealousy?*) that she isn't inside me, growing and developing on a more "typical" track. I now know the feeling that I've heard about from other moms of "preemies", but wasn't able to relate to before. But I know I'm also very blessed that she is here and alive and although she's having issues eating, she is breathing on her own and has a stabilized temperature, along with no infections. So many ups and downs in the past week here in our home. I just wish Post-Partum hormones weren't so damn hard to deal with. I think I could've watered our lawn with the amount of tears I've been shedding since I had to leave our angel girl in the hospital on Saturday.

Here is my last belly shot - and here is Keifer from that same weekend, showing off HER baby belly that Daddy helped her create.