Monday, January 21, 2008

Our meeting went well: Egg Angel #2 update

I know many people are wondering, "how did it go on Saturday?". Rest assured, it went very well. CJ and I traveled north to visit our potential egg donor #2 on Saturday, after K's afternoon nap. We got a bit of a late start, as it was a later nap than usual, and we had to stop and fill our gas tank, as it was below zero outside. It took about 45 minutes or so to get to her home, but once we arrived, we both immediately felt at ease.

She has given me the OK to blog about her, so I'll tell you her name: it's Kerry. Yep, the same as mine, albeit spelled differently. Kerry has a 3 year old beautiful son, Quinn, and has three amazing babies: triplets, to be exact. Yep. Triplets. She is a super woman. She had triplets naturally - meaning with no fertility treatments or drugs needed. She is a statistical phenomenon. There are two little guys, Ewan and Noel, and one little princess-in-training, Mairin. To say we were in love is to put it mildly. What a fun house they have.

Kerry contacted me after keeping up with my blog, and I have her blog listed on the side of MY blog- A Womb with a Few. She is friends with friends of mine, and I have enjoyed following her tales of her PG and life with babies. We had never met face to face before, or even emailed for that matter.

We arrived at Kerry's home and immediately were immersed in baby land. CJ and I put K down on the floor and started interacting with the babies and chit chatting with Kerry, as well as interacting with Quinn, who was beside himself to have visitors to entertain. Kerry and her DH also have rescued three Doxie's, so that was a fun little introduction as well, especially as one of them is highly protective of "her" babies. LOL. I think we all felt pretty comfortable, and it was so much fun to watch Keifer in her glory, trying to touch all the babies. Our girl also made her first official moves to crawl - an army crawl! YAY! The stimulating environment really got her going!

After Kerry's DH arrived home, the four of us adults got to the nitty gritty and talked about the donor egg idea. Kerry had emailed me, and to sum it all up, she had a feeling in her heart that spoke to her, that she wanted to donate her eggs to us. Of course, we were bowled over by her kindness, and especially blown away, as it happened to us the same way with our first IVF cycle - which resulted in our angel girl, K. Kerry and her DH had questions, and we all dissected all the if's and buts, and this woman is amazing: she wants to do it for us 3 times if the first few times don't work. We want to be able to do the warranty program at our clinic- which means that if we don't succeed the first 1-2-3 times, then we get a percentage of our money back in the end. We are hoping that isn't the case, and that we are lucky attempt #1. In our first IVF cycle, we pretty much were taking a crap shoot with using Mooshie the first time, as she lives far away, and we weren't sure what we would've done the second or third time around if it hadn't worked. God was sending us all his angels when we were traveling down that road, and I hope and pray he sends them back to us this summer.

Kerry also has help with her children, which is a huge factor, as my RE clinic doesn't allow children, and her appointments won't always be scheduled in stone, depending on how her body reacts to the medications. I'm guessing she won't need a lot of drugs to get her follicles revved up, as this woman is fertile! But- I was worried about the timing of appointments, and the trouble that she might have in finding help to take care of her kiddos. I don't want HER home life to be affected much if she is OKed to do this.

We left on a good note, all of us feeling good about things. Hopeful and optimistic. A bit nervous. On our drive home, K fell asleep and it was just CJ and I in the dark car, silent for awhile, both thinking our own thoughts.

Out of nowhere, I was hit with this sudden weight of sadness, like a ton of bricks, descending upon my chest. Here I was, going home after meeting the next possible egg angel for us, and I started to cry. But I knew why I was crying: I was crying because after I had Keifer, I had this glimmer of hope that perhaps my body wasn't as fucked up as it was before I had her. Maybe the PG had tricked it into behaving like a women's body typically should. But no. My body wouldn't cooperate - it won't ovulate- and it makes me sad. It makes me sad and angry at my body, and pissed off that what comes so naturally to so many, is impossible for me to achieve.

I was also grieving the loss of being able to use Mooshie as our egg donor again. Yes, we knew it wouldn't be possible, most likely, again, but still; it was such an emotional journey the first time, and starting down a new path is scary. Scary and emotional. So I was emotional. I told Kerry it has nothing against her - I'm honored that she has offered her body and her eggs to help us attempt to complete our family. But a part of CJ and I are grieving the loss of Mooshie's body, as well as my own.

I know much of this post may seem confusing right now. I'm hungry and tired. But know that I am happy and pleased as punch that Kerry is in the running. It makes me excited to think about the possibility of having more of an extended, connected network for my children in the future. It makes both CJ and I happy that our possible child/children will be able to also know THEIR egg angel. This is important to us, as Keifer will grow up knowing hers, and we want that to be somewhat special and complete for possibility #2 (and #3!?).

Please continue to pray for our family and for our egg angel #2 (in the running!). We appreciate it, and I'll continue to let you know how things go. And a special, loving thanks to Kerry, for allowing me to "out" her and let the world know just how special she really is.

The girls: Kerry & Mairin, me and Keif

The crew: Quinn, Kerry holding Noel & Mairin, me holding Ewan & Keif


kristine said...

Oh my gosh! I know it's not just the pregnancy hormones, but it sure didn't help with this one... this made me start bawling. That is so wonderful that the person that has offered to help you complete your family is someone you already "know" I really kind of wondered when you were originally talking about your potential donor when she commented with "she sounds hot" Sneaky sneaky. Congratulations on things going well. Let's hope everything else goes well and you can use and be successful with Kerry's eggs.

Ahuva Batya said...

I'm so excited for your journey, Carrie, and Kerry (I can say from personal experience) is such a wonderful person, that I have high hopes everything will work out perfectly!

Missy said...

Wow - I never would have guessed your potential egg angel #2 would be someone I knew! Kerry is awesome and, yes, very fertile! Good luck to all of you as you travel down this path. :)

LutherLiz said...

Carrie (and Kerry) you know how excited I am for you both as you search out this path. Good luck!

Beth said...

I'm leaving a comment as a blogger, following a blogger to your blog. Also, late as you posted this over a month ago, but you are in my thoughts and prayers. If you ever want a great group of ladies to talk to though this with any questions you might have, I'm sending you to:
Not only for surrogate mothers, but egg donors and IPs too.
Prayers in this journey~


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